While actual adults were discussing war, peace, and the literal fate of the planet, Trump wandered off like a toddler at a mall, because, you see, he had more important things to do.
May 5, 2025

Donald Trump ditching world leaders in Italy is like a drunk wedding crasher skipping the ceremony because he thought the open bar didn’t start until dessert—embarrassing, predictable, and entirely on brand. While actual adults were discussing war, peace, and the literal fate of the planet, Trump wandered off like a toddler at a mall, because, you see, he had more important things to do.

He needed to get back to his bed-bug ridden club in the U.S. with our stolen secrets not-safely stored in the crapper to play golf. Yep, pick fights over tariffs and your Putin reach-arounds, sneak out early for golf. We definitely picked the right "adult" to president for us.

The guy who keeps trying to buy/threaten Greenland and thinks NATO is a gym chain. So I guess a room filled with facts, maps and leaders who didn’t owe him hush money was just gonna be too heavy a lift.

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