Here's your round up of Thursday night's late night monologues! Yay!
JIMMY KIMMEL (above): You know, I knew this day would come, and yet somehow it’s even better than I imagined. It’s like coming down the stairs on Christmas morning and finding a second tree. Unless anyone think he was trolling, Musk added, 'Mark this post for the future. The truth will come out.' Man, oh, man. Vader turns on the emperor again. I mean, that’s a serious accusation. What does Elon know? What evidence could there possibly be that Trump was in league with Jeffrey Epstein other than this and this, and who could forget this video that Elon went ahead and posted today of Don and Jeff getting their freak-off at a party? I don’t know what information Elon has, but I doubt he’s just making it up, because if it’s not true, he could get sued for a zillion dollars for something like this.
.
STEPHEN COLBERT: “So, let’s recap. Come, let us recap together. The most powerful man in the world and the richest man in the world — each with their own missiles — are throwing haymakers at each other like Real Housewives on the girls’ trip. This could get dangerously out of control. But thankfully, a cooler head has stepped in to calm things down. Kanye tweeted, 'Bros, please, nooooo! [Hug emoji] We love you both so much.' Ye has entered the chat! It’s Kanye, Elon, and Trump. The easiest game of marry, [bleep], kill, because obviously, I’d kill... myself.
You know things are bad when the rational voice mediating your dispute is Kanye West.
That’s like walking into an intervention organized by Captain Morgan. 'Arr, keep drinkin’! People like you more when you’re a little spicy.'
.
Seth Meyers highlighted Elon's "Trump is on the Epstein list" tweet.
SETH MEYERS: I don’t know about DJT, but I’m having a pretty nice day! Holy shit! in the span of three hours, they went from Elon criticizing the bill to Trump threatening to take Elon’s contracts away, to Elon suggesting that Trump might be a pedophile. Also, if we were to take you at your word, Elon, you already knew that and it wasn’t a deal-breaker.”
...It’s as clear as ever that neither of these guys really believed in anything. Elon spent nearly $300 million to get Republicans elected, and now he’s shocked that they’re doing the thing everyone said they would do. And in the process, Trump used Elon to get back into power. You know, in a way, they were right. Watching these guys destroy each other is both big and — "
[clip]
TRUMP: "Beautiful."
[end clip]MEYERS: "This has been 'A Closer Look.'
