Two days after millions of Americans’ health insurance skyrocketed thanks to Donald Trump and the Republicans, President Peace Prize took time out from his marble shopping to wage war on Venezuela.
In a predictably unhinged victory lap, the mad not-king and his servile secretary of state, Marco Rubio, signaled they have more plans to ignore American suffering while they plot hemisphere domination.
Venezuela’s “whole spy agency, all that, were full of Cubans,” Rubio declared in the post-attack press conference. “This poor island took over Venezuela.”
“One of the biggest problems the Venezuelans have is they have to declare independence from Cuba that tried to basically colonize it from a security standpoint,” Rubio continued.
“So, yeah, look, if I lived in Havana and I was in the government, I'd be concerned at least a little bit,” Rubio added. He shrugged his shoulders, implying complete indifference to expanding Trump’s war.
Then, when a reporter asked, “Are you cutting off the oil flow to Cuba from Venezuela?” Rubio replied, “Well, the president already announced a week ago that anything that's sanctioned, it's sanctioned oil, it's not going to be allowed to get there.”
“The answer is yes,” Trump said.
A hideous grin broke across his face.
