August 23, 2026

To celebrate America's 250th Birthday, which was a month and a half ago, Trans Secretary Sean Duffy released a bonkers AI video of himself apparently driving a Formula One-style go-kart to highlight his "accomplishments." Of course, the AI video includes tributes to President Pedo, but for the most part, it is so self-serving that it can make you wonder whether to laugh or cry.

His first false brag is about road safety, claiming record-low traffic fatalities. What he failed to mention is that, because gas is so expensive, people are naturally driving a lot less.

His next false brag was that "Freedom Means Affordable Cars." Again, he failed to mention that between Trump's tariffs and the collapsing economy, very few people can afford even old beaters anymore.

Duffy then bragged about how his racism cost 30,000 truck drivers their licenses, mostly because they failed his English proficiency exam. He never did explain why a truck driver has to be proficient in English when the United States, like most countries, uses universal traffic signs. A person doesn't have to be able to read, much less read in English, to follow them. Regardless of that, white supremacy is never something to brag about, especially when he is no more than mediocre at best.

Duffy also brags about high-speed rail, which strikes me as something awfully woke for the likes of Duffy. Do Republicans suddenly like something other than gas-guzzling cars now? Another confusing part is when Duffy brags about maritime dominance. Is he trying to steal some of Whiskey Pete's thunder?

And for one more "you gotta be shitting me" moment, he brags about all the upgrades he's done to air traffic control systems and all the brand-new air traffic controllers he hired. Both accomplishments stem from the fact that he had fired hundreds, if not thousands, of air traffic controllers because he thought they were DEI hires, which led to the first commercial jet collision the country had seen in a decade and a half.

This whole shitshow is just another fine example of your tax dollars at work under the Pedo administration, instead of, y'know, actually going towards helping people.

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